Options

Options – a word hated and dreaded with equal passion by the creative department in any advertising agency. But why? Let us solve the mystery.

Here is a conversation between a client servicing executive and a copywriter. ‘C’ shall represent the copywriter and ‘S’ would stand for the servicing executing.

C: But why the fuck do you need more options? It is six in the evening and my friends are waiting.

S: The client said so.

C: So?

S: See, I forwarded the mail to you as it is. It is not my requirement. It is the client’s call.

C: Do you even know what this poster is supposed to do?

S: The communication strategy as discussed during the client meeting states it all. It is the result of a country-wide market research programme otherwise known as a dipstick. So the margin for error is almost nil.

C: I repeat, do you even know what this poster is supposed to do?

S: As I was saying, the client thinks the feasibility study done by the research firm justifies the need for the communication in order to increase the footfalls…

C: Whatever! Let me put it to you simply. This poster does precisely what it is supposed to do. Making a series out of it doesn’t make sense. It would dilute the communication.

S: I completely understand and I personally love the poster. But what can I do when the client is adamant?

C: Open your MBA mouth and talk.

S: See dude, you do not understand the business side of things. Do you realize how important this client is to us? This retainer pays most of our salaries.

C: Can you please cut the bullshit and come to the point?

S: (After a pause) The point is, I have no fucking clue as to what this job is all about. My boss had to go shopping and this was shoved down my throat. And I am sure she doesn’t know the job well either. Even otherwise, my job basically involves forwarding client mails to you and vice versa. I have been asked to create panic and make mountains out of molehills. I think advertising is a cool job and hence I am around. I also have a low self esteem and hence am immune to the abuses from your end and from the client’s end. I delay briefs purposely in order to stay back after 9 for free dinner and a cab ride back home. Over. Now what’s your story?

C: More options mean more work. Period.

I could go on and on. But you kinda get it, don’t you?