Monday, August 10, 2009

License to kill?

I think it is way too easy to get hold of a driver’s license in India. I think the criteria should be more stringent. I guess it is the only way to keep a check on (as eradicating would be impossible) the madness on the roads. Here is a suggestion.

There should be a psychological test as part of the regular written (can crack them with both the eyes and the mind shut) and the drawing-patterns-on-the-ground tests. This test should be contrived in such a way that the following questions would be answered about a person’s character and ability after the results are processed.

a)Does the person have the ability to spot, identify and decipher a one-way signboard? Will he be able to understand that the vehicle coming head on in the opposite direction is not the latest model of a car with headlights at the back?

b)Are there chances that the man/woman is a prospective spree killer, a fan of Charles Starkweather knowingly or unknowingly? As in, whether he/she is likely to mow down people with his Tata Sumo at the same ease with which one cuts through soft idlis?

c)Will he dim his headlights hence not blinding drivers within one kilometer radius? Does he/she realize that lampposts emit light and not vision-impairing gases?

d)Will he come to terms with the concept that cabs have numbers on them not because they are on a run after a jailbreak and hence are not criminal by manufacture?

e)Will he/she be able to realize the fact that the guy on the road in camouflage trousers is a college kid who went shopping the day before and not an infiltrating enemy soldier, and hence refrain from running him over?

f)Does he have enough understanding of the Geography to understand that all roads in India are in fact in India? And on all roads, however American their names might sound, one has to keep to the left while driving?


Happy driving!


SloganMurugan said...

What do we do if a cow comes in our way?

phoenikhs said...

Like a dedicated non-vegetarian, chop it up and eat it!

Sridevi R said...


The recent drive through the roads in 3 states brought my heart out a hundred times with the 'aiyo' I screamed.

I have plans to shine a powerful torch at the drivers with lights on high beam blinding others.

My companion used to go 'head on' towards the high beamers and swerve back to the normal course scaring them. I don’t know if they ever took the clue.

Wish we had the power to shift our life into a parrot's body and cage it in a castle before we take a ride.

(I’m refraining from commenting on all, so as to retain some sobriety…donno if I should go backwards though)

phoenikhs said...

@Sridevi - Do you blog?

SrideviR said...

Good grief! sure want to read it? They are 'an old wife's tale...dull and sorry, signifying nothing...not worth a dime.

One of my multifaces resemble yours, hence I vent here. Anyways...who can stop fate?

phoenikhs said...

I think I will take a chance. If it is bound to happen, it will. As you said, fate is unstoppable. :)