tribute to a Chelsea fan!

at least get the ball right!

Me: Are you a football fan?
He: Yes.
Me: Which club do you follow?
He: Chelsea.
Me: Why?
He: They have so many stars and moreover, they won the premiership title for two consecutive years.
Me: Who is your favorite Chelsea player?
He: Frank Lampard. He was the runner up at some competition. The journalists voted him the second best and some South American guy won the trophy. I bet he cheated.
Me: You mean Ronaldinho.
He: I am not sure. All their names start with ‘R’ right?
Me: What do you think of John Terry?
He: Is he the new striker we(Chelsea) bought?
Me: Mighty close. He is the central defender who also happens to be Chelsea’s captain.
He: Oh, we buy so many players these days that I can’t remember all the names. He plays for England right?
Me: No, for Sudan you dope-head. Yes, of course. And what a coincidence, he is also the England captain.
He: But, isn’t Sven the England captain.
Me: He was the England coach before McLaren took over. Coach is different, captain is different.
He: Whatever!
Me: So, do you think Chelsea will the treble this season?
He: When does it start?
Me: Treble is not a competition. It is a term used to collectively represent the FA cup, the premiership and the Champion’s League.
He: Alright. I am not very good at remembering all these names you know. I just love Chelsea and that is all I care about.
Me: What do you think about the new signings?
He: Did the new owner, that American guy sell Chelsea? What is with the signings? I don’t remember hearing anything on it on last night’s sports center.
Me: It is a Russian guy, Abrahomovic by name. and he sure would love to sell Chelsea with such supporters. Anywayz, I was taking about the new players you guys bought.
He: Oh…Bullock and Shiva.
Me: Yeah, Ballack and Sheva.
He: Yeah, whatever. I think they are good. They played at the world cup right? They should be good. All Chelsea players are bound to be good. One of my friends said that Frank Lampard is the best player to have ever played in England.
Me: Did your friend ever mention the existence of a man called George Best?
He: No. Nice nickname though. Best. Was he that Good?
Me: Pele considered him the best player to have ever walked the earth.
He: Pele??? I bet every member on the Pele committee was bribed. Blink.
Me: Is there any other club you follow?
He: Chelsea won the trophy the last two years. Why should I follow any other club? If they lose, I may think of switching. I hate Manchester United though.
Me: May I ask why?
He: They beat us last season and they are also our rivals and…all my fellow Chelsea fans hate them. I think they suck.
Me: Is that so?
He: They have always, in the last two years, finished behind us. They have won a few I should say. I don’t think they even have the kind of heritage Chelsea has. The blues rule.
Me: Manchester United has more silverware in their cabinet than your Chelsea Owner can hoard in his mansion. And as far as history is concerned, I don’t think they have much to be proud about than being the third most successful club in the history of European Football.
He: That is all in the past.
Me: That’s what we call history in the rest of the world? What is it called in your part of the world?
He: But whatever, Ferguson is a sucker when compared to Chelsea captain or coach or whatever. Look at what he has achieved and what Ferguson has.
Me: Yeah. Sigh. How can you compare the two premiership titles Mourinho has achieved with Chelsea to the 8 titles, 5 FA cups, 1 Champions League trophy, a treble, and yes .. a knighthood for his invaluable contribution to English Football that Sir Alex has achieved.
He: And moreover, we have a rich history of players too. Jimmy Floyd err something and all.
Me: Zola? Vialli? Petrescu?
He: I can’t remember any of the famous Manchester United players though. Probably they did not have any.
Me: Charlton, Best, Law, Hughes, Robson, Cantona, etc. Yes. We did not have many famous players. We had a few legends though. Or maybe it is because you are too young to remember them or even better…the names were too European to remember.
He: Anyways, catch you later. I am in a hurry.
Me: Hang on, the match is not on until Sunday.
He: What match? I don’t see matches. They are too lengthy. I am going to watch sports center.
That’s where I get all my knowledge from.
Me: So long buddy. Sigh. So much for a Cheslki fan.